Hi, LA Angels? Yes, I'd like to borrow your rally monkey please. Seeing as you are on the top of your division and seem to be winning games, I don't think you really need him right now. But the Astros, well they need the monkey and a whole lot more!!
Seems the whole rally cap thing isn't working out too good for us. And obviously our pitchers are not wearing women's underwear or abstaining from sex. No one seems to cutting the heads off of chickens and saying prayers to the voodoo gods of batting, fielding, and WINNING!
No we are in troubled times here and we need major help. Thank God the Yankees are worse and taking up the majority of sportscasters' time, but they are starting to catch on. And before we are completely embarrassed and called out on how terrible we SUCK, I would like to try the whole primate jumping in the outfield thing. Or shirtless college boys jumping up and down with signs, maybe that would work. I think topless women would just be too distracting. But anything!
Just a little help please! I have some bananas.
No comments:
Post a Comment