Don't even get me started on the tooth fairy

The imaginary beings are really screwing with my life. Case in point...Christmas Eve, I did not get to bed until 3:30am. Someone was very excited and would not go to sleep. And was hellbent on catching Santa. That same someone kept me up on Easter Eve because she was going to catch the bunny. This is why I take 5 hour naps on holidays.

And honestly, I am so over the Easter Bunny. If he wasn't such good friends with the Jolly Old Elf, I would totally blow his cover. I mean, it's not like he really brings anything good. Unlike the rest of our little slice of suburbia, our baskets consist of candy and maybe one or two trinkets of crap small toys. No handheld electronics, nothing that requires batteries, no big bouncy balls. It's candy, bubbles and this year, prayer journals. Because I do believe the holiday has something to do with God.

And it's good that they don't expect too much from the bunny. That's a tradition I started early on. I mean for the first 4 years that I was a mother, I never did a basket. My girls were always at their dad's. And then when sweet "myth-buster" came along, I still had a good two years before she needed to have a basket. By that time, it was a midnight run to the picked over Walgreens and thus the traditional basket of junk was born.

The Easter Bunny doesn't hide eggs. I do that. Sometimes. And the eggs have prepackaged goodies and the children go with me to pick them out at Target. So we are not that delusional about a giant bunny. But we do expect him to bring chocolate. And that's about it.

As for our friend up north...well of course we expect a bit more from him. But even he doesn't bring all the really good stuff. I kinda like to take credit for the things I buy. And while I know one day they will look back and know that Mom really was the one that got that super-cool gotta have it now thing, I am a big fan of instant gratification.

Of course this year he did bring the must have item of the year. The very coveted Zhu Zhu Pets. And thank God he is forced to watch Nickelodeon with the kids so that he knows to run out and get such things in October before they are all sold out forever. Or only available to be shipped from China at ten times the price. And so Santa got them fake hamsters...and Mom got them Rock Band. And within a few short weeks, this letter was written:

Let me translate for those of you not fluent in kindergarten. It says "Dear Santa, our zhu zhu pets don't work." Can I tell you how devastated that little five year old was that Santa brought her a bum deal. So next year, HE'S gonna have to bring an Ipod or a pony or something to restore a little faith. Yeah, he's totally gonna mess with my Christmas.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm all about the girls holding on and believing. And I will be the first to beat down any kid at school that tells them Santa isn't real and that babies don't come from storks. But I do long for that day when we can take a trip over the holidays and wake up to a beach in Maui or some slopes in Colorado and not to piles of stuff we don't need. I look forward to the day when we can just celebrate being together. But until that day, I'll happily tiptoe around, eat cookies, leave a bunny trail, scrounge for quarters to stick under pillows, and be in love with my girls' faces when they see the "magic".

But I wouldn't object to a little sleep while I'm waiting.